SEX the three letter word that everyone is afraid to talk about but most people don’t go a day without thinking about it.
I want to first start by asking, what is your relationship with your own sexuality?
For a long time I had so much shame around my sexuality. Why? Mostly because of my upbringing with my porn addiction and programming that sex is “bad.” There is so little education around sex, especially sacred sexuality and conscious intimacy.
When you have sexual shame, your body will close down during intercourse. You will want to “hide” and you will not feel intimate with the other person. You will feel very unsafe and exposed.
I think we do intimacy backwards. We think we need to engage physically first to see if we have a connection. Without a spiritual and emotional connection first, the sexual intimacy is just primal. There is no heart involved. It’s not much different than two animals having sex. It’s unconscious behavior, two people using each other to masturbate and climax.
Sexuality is a beautiful thing and very sacred. The more conscious you are with your partner, the more intimate your experience will be.
If you feel you need to cleanse yourself from past sexual encounters, I would recommend working with an energy healer. Also, meditate on releasing/purifying your energy field by working with the white light energy.
Drop a “❤️” and TAG 2 people who need to see this!
Sending you infinite love and healing! 🙌♥️
The SLUTEVER S2 Free Box Set Has Just Dropped on All 4
From VR porn to sexual witchcraft, Slutever is back with another season of sex-positive voyeurism to challenge our notions of gender, sexuality and relationships.
2 days ago
How do I convince myself and everyone else that I’m worthy of being loved?
When we measure our worth based on things like accomplishments, appearance, intelligence, education―or even our work in the church—we are going to come up empty. Join us for a conversation about how we can truly come to understand that there is something more profound than what other people think about us. ☕️ Get the tea at authenticintimacy.com/podcast, via the link bio, or on any major podcast platform.
3 days ago
Minun on käsketty tyytyä suhteeseen, jossa koin etten voinnut olla itseni. Olen kuullut ihmisten suista kuiskaukset, miten kannattaa unohtaa ja jättää kertomatta omalle kumppanille. Ei tilanteet olekaan ikinä mustavalkoisia, mutta itse en uskon tyytymisen, salailun tai unohtamisen uskomuksiin parisuhteessa. Ne ovat vanhoja historiamme, sosiaalisen ympäristömme ja kulttuurimme muokkaamia uskomuksia, mitkä saa ja voi kyseenalaistaa. Seksuaaliterapeuttina olen näiden äärellä usein asiakkaideni kanssa. Kysymys kuuluu mihin sinä uskot? Miksi? Entä kumppanisi? Lue lisää uudesta blogispostauksestani Rakkaus, Tinder ja tyytyminen, johon on linkki biossa. Tämä on pohjustus sille, miten lähteä puhumaan omista toiveista seksistä ja seksuaalisuudessa oman kumppanin kanssa. 💛
Kuva by Muru @mattikihlstrom 📸💗
I have been told to settle for a relationship where I could not be myself. Heard whispers, how I should forget and not tell my own companion. Life is never black&white, but I do not belief in settling, “forgetting”, secrecy or obmutescence in a relationship. These are old beliefs that derive from our culture, social environment and history, which can and should be challenged.
As a sex therapist I encounter these issues regularly with my clients. The questions goes as follows: What do you believe in? Why? How about your companion?
Never settle & keep talking about your sexual desires and sexuality with your companion. 💛
🌝 TAURUS FULL MOON 🌝
The Taurus Full Moon arrives on Tuesday at 8:34am Eastern Time, conjunct Vesta, asteroid of sacred sexuality. Falling in sensual Taurus, this Full Moon is helping us ground, seek pleasure, and slow down as we continue the deep work of Mercury retrograde in Scorpio, who’s been pulling us into our deepest shadows.
Now, the Scorpio Sun is conjunct Mercury retrograde while opposite the Taurus Moon. We’re experiencing the powerful tension between all that’s complicated and all that’s simple—the intricacies of our psychology grounding into the mere act of touching Earth.
The myth associated with Taurus is Persephone rising from the underworld having faced her shadows. She tames Cerus, the wild Bull, and together they set the flowers in bloom. Because she has met her fears, she is able to be fully present with the pleasures of Spring, relishing in earthly beauty.
Like Persephone, we can come back from our deep plunges into shame, trauma, and gloom. We can make time for ourselves to exit the bustle and drama of our lives and enjoy the richness and abundance that’s ever-present, no matter how much or how little we have.
How blue is the sky? How bright the Moon? Does the cold air remind us of our awakeness? The warm Sun of our expansive hearts?
Mercury, though tiny by comparison, eclipses the Sun just before this Full Moon becomes exact, in a rare transit that is helping us improve our communication, while also bringing us important messages of truth. Now is the time to trust ourselves more, opening to the deeper truths that lie in our bodies, rather than the chatter of our minds.… 🌝✨ Read more in my article. Link in bio
Image: Anna Pugh
People who identify as asexual don’t really feel sexual attraction towards anyone. They may think other people are physically attractive, or they may want to be in romantic relationships with people — but they’re not interested in having sex or doing sexual things with other people. Asexuality isn’t black and white — it’s a spectrum just like other sexual orientations. How you identify is always up to you. 🎨: @Pink_Bits#regram#asexuality#asexual#sexuality#art#LGBTQIA#AisforAsexuality
“There’s something about having a foundation of truth, deep down. It gives you courage. I’m not hiding anything, I don’t have to be afraid of anything...” Some wise words from pops on the podcast this week.
After 20 years of marriage and 3 kids, he made the courageous decision to start living his truth. It wasn’t an easy process and it took lots of time to get there, but his life has changed in some amazing ways since.
The burning question is: How does someone suppress who they really are for 50+ years of their life? ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
It’s hard to say for sure, but the answer lies somewhere in the rigid prescription our society gives us for what “happiness” and “success” should look like.
In the episode, we talked about how no matter what you’re struggling with, people need to know they’re not alone.
We also talked about the delicate balance of embracing and learning from the past and moving forward to live for tomorrow.
Don’t miss this incredible story!
1 week ago
I’m on my way to NYC to spend the weekend with Esther Perel and the big beautiful community she has cultivated. I’ll be joining Esther on stage to discuss her keynote, “Finding the Erotic Self.” When it comes to this tender topic, here’s what I know for sure: most of us are in need of some sexual healing. As we’re growing up, we are deluged with sex-negative messages that create deep associations between sex and danger/death/fear/sin/shame. For those whose sexual identities, gender expressions, skin and bodies are systemically marginalized in our culture, the message that “you are wrong as you are” is suffocating. Those internalized messages meet up with the unavoidable truth that sex evokes profound vulnerability— a nakedness that is both physical and psychological. What a perfect storm of struggle! To struggle with honoring and integrating our sexual self is understandable. But if we can’t name that struggle, bringing into the light of conversation and wholehearted exploration, the struggle goes underground, cordoned off from the rest of us. And that which has been marginalized is ripe for shame and for acting out. —-
But here’s the catch. In 2019, we don’t just get shaming and silencing messages. We also get a set of well-meaning messages encouraging us to break free. Be sex-positive. Be sexually confident. Be free. I’m here for this, but I want to name a double edged sword. Mindlessly taking on this opposite set of messages about how we “should” be unapologetically sexually self-confident creates a new variation on an old theme. One the carries the same risk: disconnection from self. Under this new paradigm, sex becomes a performance, an attempt to offload shame by providing your prowess. If you are craving self-confidence in the bedroom, I celebrate you. I just want you to honor this as a healing journey that must be fueled by fierce self-compassion. Listen to the stories you’ve internalized that were never yours to begin with. Identify your boundaries so that you can flow between risk and safety. Be careful not to personalize this as *your* struggle. Shedding sexual shame and moving toward wholeness is a *we* thing. You are shedding generations of ick.
3 weeks ago
Body image and intimacy are deeply entwined. If she is waging an endless war against her flesh and bones (“my body is too this, not enough that”) she going to have a very difficult time letting you in. You with your earnest desire, you who wants to worship at the alter of her, you who wants to make your bodies a playground of exploration and play. Your desire for nearness feels wholly incongruous with the stories she’s been telling herself all day. What’s worse, these stories almost always contain lies that masquerade as promises— “once I lose x pounds/tighten this up/build these muscles, *THEN* I’ll want erotic connection.” Sadly, it doesn’t work that way though. When she hinges her deservingness of erotic connection on the current state of her body, the goal post has a funny way of moving. Five pounds become 7. ——
This burden she carries, this civil war within, she didn’t start it. She watched her mother and aunties scowl at their reflections in the mirror. She has been flooded with countless images since she was just a girl, tying her worth to her ability to live up to somebody else’s standard. She carries the weight of an entire culture, and this burden blocks the path between her and her pleasure. Pleasure is all about the now. Pleasure delights in what is, as it is. Pleasure says, “you don’t have to do anything to be entitled to feel good, connected, whole.” —-
The arrow goes in both directions:
* In order to experience pleasure, there needs to be a truce between her body and her. * The experience of pleasure can help catalyze a peace treaty between her body and her... with the promise of negotiating new terms founded upon fierce and abiding love.
2 days ago
"i’m an actor, ok?" @jamescusatimoyer is dustin. see him act: link in bio. (📸: @emiliomk)
1 week ago
(CW: Sexual trauma)
Slowly but surely, as a culture, we are talking more openly than ever about sexual trauma and recovery. This heartens me as survivors should never have to carry that impossibly heavy burden alone. Violation occurs in the space between people and must therefore also heal in the space between people. What I want to highlight is an essential both/and in the journey of recovery from trauma: BOTH the healing AND the reclamation. * The healing is about surviving; the reclamation is about thriving.
* The healing is about “not feeling bad”; the reclamation is about feeling GOOD.
* The healing is about reducing pain; the reclamation is about embracing pleasure.
I loved listening to Dr. Holly Richmond talk at Esther Perel’s Sessions Live event. I want to share these two pieces, as I think they serve as powerful pillars for this sacred work:
#1. Let yourself off the hook. Nearly universal in the experience of trauma is a sense of responsibility. Therefore, essential in the reclamation is supporting a survivor letting themselves off the hook. Notice when that story of self-blame comes up. Meet it with fierce self-compassion: I let myself off the hook.
#2. That was then, this is now. As a survivor of sexual trauma reclaims their erotic self, they are energetically saying to the perpetrator, “This is MINE. It always has been, and it always will be.” Inviting pleasure back into the body is a process. The trauma of the past can be activated by touch in the present, and the challenge/opportunity is to stay right here right now. See if a practice of joining touch with breath and a grounding mantra like “that was then, this is now” helps you stay more and more present for the experience of giving and receiving pleasure in your body. Note: this is predicated upon touching and being touched by someone who has earned the privilege of being close to you!!!! ——
Reclamation is beautiful, messy, relational, difficult, and possible.
1 week ago
Last week I got to help pull off a conference for middle and high school LGBTQIA+ students and it was all so cool. Seeing students be in a queer majority space for the first time was so cool. Being able to work with other queer adults in a professional space was so cool. Being out at work was SO COOL.
One of my coworkers at the event said something after it was all over that has been rumbling around in my head ever since. They said that health education so often focuses narrowly on prevention of adverse health outcomes. We talk to young people about barrier methods and safer sex and regular STI testing all the time but we fail to talk about how events like these are prevention too. Community is prevention. Feeling loved (not just tolerated) is prevention.
I think finding a place where you feel supported by your peers is JUST AS IMPORTANT as moving your body and getting 8 hours of sleep and all those traits we ascribe to a “healthy” life - especially especially for queer people. So consider this your reminder to foster community in all your spaces - at work, at school, at home. Allow yourself to feel like the time you spend creating a safe space for yourself is just as (...or more...🙃) valuable as the time society tells you to spend on meal planning or exercising.
anyhow, please enjoy this dorky picture of myself that I took on self timer in a corner of the convention center so I could always remember this grin and this outfit 😎
Near the end of “Booksmart,” a kiss turns into more: Two characters engage in a hookup that’s been hailed as an unusually frank, on-screen portrayal of sex between two women. But watch it on a Delta Air Lines flight, and the R-rated high school comedy will skip right through that scene. Reportedly, the in-flight cut also passes over the words “vagina” and “genitals,” an exchange about a lesbian sex act, talk of a urinary tract infection, and a scene where the two lead characters watch porn in the back of a ride-share. Those edits — made by an outside company that works with the airline — are drawing the ire and confusion of passengers and Hollywood insiders alike, in what’s at least the fourth instance when same-sex romance has been stripped from an in-flight Delta movie in recent years. In a statement to The Washington Post early Thursday, Delta said its “content parameters do not in any way ask for the removal of homosexual content from the film.”(Photo by Marvin Joseph)
Alex with his brother 🖤
Recently a pic I posted of Alex inadvertently sparked a discussion about his sexuality in the comments. Frankly I was quite disappointed and saddened by this.
Alex is an amazing actor. It is a pity that most people, however, spend a lot of time speculating about his sexuality.
Despite being a public figure, he doesnt have the responsibility and need to tell the public about his sexuality. Playing Billy Bloom and Elliot doesnt make him gay; playing James doesnt make him straight. God knows he might be trans! But does it matter? No. What matters is his work. And I believe Alex would love people talking about his work rather than fixating on his mating preferences. 🖤🖤
Sorry about the rant. I just needed to get it out there especially because so many people have asked about his sexuality in comments.
Ps Alex doesnt have an instagram account. THIS IS A FAN ACCOUNT. And to quote @cameronlawther and @jessybarden , thank god he doesnt have social media. (Imagine if he did what kind of sh*t show it would have become.) 🖤
Photo cred: @cameronlawther
2 weeks ago
I’ve been living so much in my head lately as I work, build a business, prepare to travel, and check off my to-do’s. I could feel the tension and anxiety filling to the brim into overflow. ⠀
I laid down to explore my sensations and pleasure to find my way back to my body and there were GIANT walls of resistance!!! “You can’t slow down, you can’t be in flow, no time for pleasure!!”
Why is it challenging at times to be in my body, feel pleasure, turn on, flow? ⠀
Do you notice the resistance around pleasure and tapping into your sensuality? Do you ever feel numb, dead inside, zero sex drive, depressed, and/or anxious? ⠀
This is the body’s way of telling us we’ve been living WAY too much in our head. ⠀
It’s our body’s way of inviting us back to our sensations, genius and pleasure. ⠀
Underneath the healing and understanding of the resistance, there is so much innate pleasure and flow!! ⠀
I invite you to inquire within. How do you make time for your body and pleasure? 💋⠀
1 week ago
Coming up on Living Strong! - Finding your True North, a 4 part Q&A series on some of life's rattling questions - digital dependency, sexuality, inclusivity, cultural appropriation, suicide and depression & world standards effecting today's 20+ generation. We have counselor Jean George breaking these down backed by core truths from the Word.
Starting Monday, 18 November Godtv 9pm IST.
Tune in 📺
it’s time for new work by new black thought leaders on broadway. and by bringing the macgregor plantation to broadway, jeremy o. harris did just that. // @jeremyoharris on @hot97. link in bio for tix.
1 week ago
Most of you don't know I have a background in biology and business and I'm high key obsessed with sexuality and behavioral patterns. This has a lot to do with what I'm doing in 2020 but I'm kicking it off by shooting a music video with @killingjokefilms in December all about emboldening femme/female identifying/presenting/bodied/passing people to be the provocateurs of their own sexuality and addressing the shame/fear/taboo that follows sex and sexuality as a whole. Aesthetically, I'm pulling all kinds of inspiration from my favorite video game, @vampirethemasquerade
Thanks for coming to my TED talk. If you wanna be in the video, DM me.
3 weeks ago
C O M P E T I T I O N T I M E!!! 💰💰💇♂️💇♂️
Let's talk about 'Straight Gays' + Enter the competition below for a FABULOUS prize!
Juiciest topic yet is up on YouTube now, click the link in my bio 💦 @cein_paparizou my good pal opened up about 'Straight' married men that indulge in sexual acts with gay men to fulfil a sexual desire. Apologies in advance if we make you question your partners sexuality 👀
Neisha from @catwalkhairco and I have teamed up this week to give away a FULL SET of @platinumhairextensions with Keratin Tips to the value of €350! 🙊🤩
All you have to do is - Share this post to your story or a screenshot/video of you watching the YouTube episode to your story, of course you also have to follow and tag the below Instagram profiles:
You guys have 6 days, winner announced on Sunday 3rd of November 👑
Enjoy the TEA ❤
I got this #giftfromHBO to celebrate tonight’s premiere of #MrsFletcher on #HBO because I’ve made a name for myself as a #sexpositive#trans person. Which just goes to show how being shameless can really work out.
But seriously, I’m so excited for this series. First, it’s about #sexuality, and will start a conversation, which, um, we need. And also, @smartassjen is in it. Fucking swoon and hell yes.
Watch and discuss in the comments?
1 week ago
✂La mujer como un hombre incompleto, mutilado. Esta idea atraviesa todo el estudio antiguo de la anatomía femenina. El hombre, representado por el elemento fuego, y la mujer por el elemento inferior agua, ella sin poder tener el calor necesario para desarrollar el falo, y dejaba solo una puntita de un pene incompleto a la vista . .
. ❓Suena muy cualquiera? Por suerte ahora si, pero para los chabones griegos de la época de Aristóteles no. Y cuando hablamos de lecturas machistas sobre el cuerpo, este tipo de cosas vale rescatarlas, son la base de todo lo que se construyó después. Galeno (médico griego) decia que "por su naturaleza más fría y húmeda conservan un pene replegado en el interior de su cuerpo". PFFF
. 🎉El clítoris es el único órgano destinado al placer, es su única función. Lo visible es solo la punta de su estructura que se extiende como 15 mm alrededor de los labios y tiene 8 mil terminaciones nerviosas únicamente destinadas al goce. 8 mil! El doble que el "pene completo". Fijate con qué te quedás, Galeno 🤣.
#clitoris #clit#sexualidad#sexuality#menstrual#orgasm#sex#ginecologia#vulva#vagina .
Proud to Be More
People are constellations of inter-sectional identities, and none of us can just be one identity over the other. As Queer individuals, we're often told we speak about some intersections of our identity more than the others- mostly the queer part.
Our identity is a whole range of multiple things that we are and roles that we play in different peoples' life. We are queer. We are also queer parents, children, friends, acquaintances. We are someone's two am friend, someone's home away from home, an internet friend to reach out to- and more.
We are fantastic microcosms of experiences and dreams walking this world together and making this world our home, little by little. Identity by identity.
We are queer.
We are more than queer.
And, we are #ProudToBeMore.
What does #ProudToBeMore mean to you? Send us your stories and experiences to add to this project by Gaysi and Levi's by DMing us or sending us an email at [email protected]
2 weeks ago
Sex is sacred. Sexuality and spirituality are two sides of the same coin. They are available to transcend 3D. Mira, pero where you go is up to the frequency and connection with your sexual partners. Lower frequencies are when you’re just using a body to masterbate with. Higher frequencies stimulates soul connection. Eye contact, balanced giving and receiving, and mutual respect can elevate sexual experiences. Yasss it’s natural to have needs but before acting on them assess if the energy is helping you or hurting you. Self awareness is key. I am not promoting shame around casual sex. It’s up to you how you work with your life force energy. Just keep it 💯%‼️Be real. Say how you feel.
Many of us are experiencing creative blocks which is tied to the connection we have with our sexuality. How much we allow ourselves pleasure and under what conditions. Your first sexual relationship starts with you. Pay attention to what feels good on a mental, spiritual, and physical level. If you’ve been giving your power away, reel it in to bring balance back.
Book your reading on my website:
I do pre recorded readings or live call readings. I don’t do same day readings tho! I gotta honor my energy and schedule. I love youz!!
Clementine Chloë 🍊
🧿Head of the BEEloved coven🧿
1 week ago
Hace un tiempo descubrí #sexpositivity, un concepto que me pareció súper interesante. Yo siempre he pensado que todxs, de cualquier género o identidad, merecemos una libertad sexual real sin prejuicios. Esta libertad empieza en ti mismo, y he querido hacer visible este mensaje a través de estas camisetas. El cambio soló será posible si nos permitimos explorar nuestro propio cuerpo fuera de la culpa o la vergüenza y una forma totalmente natural.
Os animo a incomodar con estas camisetas y a compartir el mensaje! 🔥
A while ago I discovered #sexpositivity this concept blew my mind. I’ve always thought that all of us deserve,no matter our gender or identity, a truly free sexual liberty without judgement. This freedoms starts in yourself, that’s why I wanted to make it visible with this tshirts. The change will only be possible if we allow ourselfs to explore our own bodies away from the shame and guilt in total natural way.
I encourage you to don’t be shy and spread the message! 🔥