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1 month ago
How can you know your boundaries when you’ve never experienced a situation before?
Short answer: you can’t!
Longer answer: (1) Start with what you do know; (2) Understand that boundaries shift and change over time and with experience.
Other skills you’ll need: the ability to reflect on your experiences so you can thoughtfully adjust them and the ability to communicate your initial boundaries and changes you need to make over time!
This is a clip from the Q&A Session on “Before You Open Your Relationship” that’s available as a part of the Unscripted Membership. For $5/month, you get an Education Session, a Q&A, a review of a book, and the opportunity to influence syllabus topics. Sign up is in my bio!
The free syllabus with all sorts of good resources will be dropping next week - you can also find the link to that in my bio as well.
Mañana 31 te recomiendo una buena fiesta. #HashtagOpen para cerrar el año.
2 months ago
I have to say that I was pleasantly surprised by the results from my #dating & #consent IG poll from yesterday! Thanks to everyone who participated!😘 Being a #DatingCoach for over 10 years and heavily integrating #consent into my coaching over the past couple years, I’ve heard a lot of different perspectives. *
When I started writing my consent book, #TheConsentGuidebook , I was hearing a lot of, “talking about consent isn’t sexy.” To be clear, I am still hearing that from people, but as you can see from the results, people are getting more comfy with the concept of enthusiastic consent! PS. You can totally be creative and make your consent convo sexy! But also, it’s important to seek out partners who share your feelings about a wanting to have a full (or minimal) consent convo. I do encourage having a short consent convo at the least to discuss how exactly you do or don’t want to discuss it. Whew...that was a mouthful!😉 But seriously, you’re just making sure everyone is on the same page and lessening the potential for hurt feelings and hurt bodies. That’s why these poll results make me so happy....it looks like a lot of you are pro-consent convos! Yay!🥰 *
This is why I’m so excited to partner with new #datingapp@hashtagopen ...they believe in #consentculture while still living out loud boldly and proudly!🌈 They have 24 gender options, 23 sexual orientation options, and 10 relationship style options to choose from on the app so that you can consensually and respectfully match, mingle and discuss what lights you up! *
Check out #hashtagopen for #free in the App Store, avail for both iPhone and android! And don’t forget to pop by #hashtagopen ‘s event at @pleasurecheststores in #LA Aug 1st from 8-10pm! I’ll be there hosting and facilitating all the mingling and swag distributing!🤗
Yeah, after two months on the @okcupid@bumble and @tinder, I was so discouraged that I paused my profile. I stayed on @hashtagopen as it leaves room for me to filter based on what’s most important to me AND I don’t have to use Facebook to log in.
. Repost: @theannehodder .
I’ve been off the dating scene for years now (😅) but I can only imagine how different my life would have been had I had access to an online community of like-minded and open-minded individuals. I recently came across a series of emails and chat conversations that shared (in detail!) some of the best and some of the most painful experiences I had while using dating apps. (This was before Tinder existed...yes, there was a time before Tinder!)
I learned from many of them and don’t hold any regrets about the experiences, but it’s a bummer to hear friends’ and clients’ dating stories (the disasters, at least) and how similar they sound to those I had in 2010/2011. So much...and so little has changed in 8ish years.
@theellechase is a go-to source for pleasure advocacy and body-acceptance support, and she’s a huge fan of the Open dating app for so many reasons. I wonder if this can help spark some of the change we so desperately need in the online dating world. Only time will tell, I guess?
#hashtagopen #openapp#wearehashtagopen #opencommunity