I sat in a doctors office yesterday, and he said, how are you doing? My reply. Better. He said Kristy, “you have been to hell and back... that WILL take a toll physically.” I immediately felt myself fighting tears, and said yes, yes I have, and I realize that now. I finally see that stress and what all I just went through it CAN take a physical toll. And I can heal. Actually, I WILL heal both physically and emotionally!
Here is the thing friends... we all have breaking points and for a year I kept myself together, I smiled and kept up a front, I compartmentalized, I put my head down and worked. I walked beaches alone with my kids on vacations. I did holidays as a single parent. I stood as a pillar of strength where I could for my kids, my friends, my family, my business partners, and my passions AND I sacrificed my body by not getting sleep and not asking for help always. I knew it couldn't last forever, so I do what I know how to do best... kept going.
I hide the pain from my kids, worry from my parents/family, and even my closest friends didn’t know some of the depths I walked. But I survived, and I am forever changed from it. These last 18 months of my life will forever be the hardest I have ever walked, and as heading into the last week of school and into a new summer, I can guarantee you that although I feel like this woman here last summer walking this beach is physically stronger... I know this woman sitting here in her robe that just slept 8 hours, in her new home, in a new normal is a hell of a lot stronger! I have no idea what the future holds. I know I have to keep taking steps in the direction of things that the passion runs deep, that makes me smile, and continue to give myself the grace to get "there"! Again thank you for being here friends. Thanks for sharing me and tagging people that need to see my story. I just oddly know my current calling and part of my healing is sharing my life with all you. Even as raw and as vulnerable as this is.
Dear 2nd-Time Single,
Meet one of the VIP members of my love squad. My dog Nyla. This beautiful Pitbull / Boxer mix makes sure I never feel forgotten or abandoned. She’s like the secret service when it comes to my heart.
Although she’s experienced big change ( the death of my Golden Retriever Charlie as well as not seeing my Ex as a result of the divorce), she never wavers on her unconditional love for me and the kids. She is always on point and on duty and for that I am eternally grateful.
To the best baby dog therapist ever....Thank you for helping me hang on to me and supporting us all emotionally in the midst of difficult changing family dynamics. .
I am a wreck—yea the emotional kind. Wandering the streets and bars of a vibrant city, I talked with old friends and I laughed with new friends. I emptied myself out last night, only to awake this morning totally empty. (Did you get that play on words? Empty myself to feel empty...hahaha!)
And so all day I was in a funk. The laughter of a gaggle of kids sounded muffled. One minute I am playing hide-n-seek, and the next minute I am crying dry tears because there’s nothing left in me. ..
As I sit here thinking about divorce, I realize this is all part of the process. And it’s normal to bounce back and forth. Each loss gives me margin and room for growth. ..
Let me give you an example: I miss my house. Huge, spacious, lots of rooms for the kids, amazing kitchen for cooking and entertaining, a dream house. And now we are cramped in a rental with kids stacked to the ceiling in one room and small kitchen with crappy appliances.
I could mourn the loss of my house or I can celebrate the adventure. I can appreciate what we have now, and dream and plan for the next home. So it’s normal to feel loss, but only the champions will focus on the gain. Where in your life do you choose GAIN?
#lossorgain #2019goals#divorceddad#divorcedmom#divorced#divorcebible#divorcesucks#singledad#singlemom#singleparent#mindset#mindsetcoach#mindsetiseverything#renewedmind#realtor#houseforsale#forsalebyowner#byob#broadway#nothungover (Reposted)